Marriage can be difficult, even if both partners value it and hope to maintain it. A husband hard of hearing may be worse off then most when it comes to making the Golden Years happy ones. In fact, he may not even know what is happening at first, since many men fail to realize that they are losing this important sense.
He comes home from a hard day and there's his wife, with dinner almost ready and a pleasant smile. He settles in for his favorite program, cranks up the volume a little (the set is getting old and the sound is not as clear as it once was), and relaxes. Suddenly there is his wife, looking cross and shouting - shouting - that dinner is ready. He doesn't realize that this is the third time she's said this and that she's shouting to be heard over the blaring TV.
One problem that doesn't have such an easy solution is that men, as they begin to lose their hearing, have trouble with high-pitched sounds. This, of course, includes their wife's voice. A woman who's used to pleasant conversation in the car or to communicating with her spouse in another room now finds herself often ignored. This may irritate her, which may bewilder her husband.
Or perhaps what she's saying is important, so she says it again, with wholly unnecessary emphasis and volume. "You don't have to shout!" he responds, and their happy meal is headed downhill fast. Counselors say that this common problem is very disruptive. They actually show women how to look directly at their husbands, pitch their voices low, and speak slowly and clearly. Only a well-informed and loving wife can accept this new approach gracefully, especially since her husband may not even notice her extra effort.
Hopefully both partners want to avoid letting a physical problem derail a happy union. The husband may have to steel himself to getting hearing aids - never as good as natural sound - and having them adjusted until they work well. The wife will have to remember not to talk from the other room, to allow for background noise, and to keep a pleasant expression on her face even as she repeats herself.
Many couples opt for extreme measures, like surgery. Implants used to be mainly for children but now are not unusual for seniors. Active men want to hear their wives, daughters, and grandkids. They don't want to miss sermons at church, phone conversations, or the general babble at family gatherings.
Fortunately the husband in our story decides to get informed early, since he has spent his working life in a noisy environment - the military (or farming, or carpentry, or as a musician, or as a miner) - that has probably damaged his ears. He also knows that his high blood pressure, his bad circulation, and his medications can contribute to hearing loss. Being deaf is worse for relationships than being blind, so he wants to do what he can.
Specialists, clinics, and professional technicians can provide information and testing to determine the level of loss. It will really help if husbands and wives work together to anticipate this problem and seek solutions.
He comes home from a hard day and there's his wife, with dinner almost ready and a pleasant smile. He settles in for his favorite program, cranks up the volume a little (the set is getting old and the sound is not as clear as it once was), and relaxes. Suddenly there is his wife, looking cross and shouting - shouting - that dinner is ready. He doesn't realize that this is the third time she's said this and that she's shouting to be heard over the blaring TV.
One problem that doesn't have such an easy solution is that men, as they begin to lose their hearing, have trouble with high-pitched sounds. This, of course, includes their wife's voice. A woman who's used to pleasant conversation in the car or to communicating with her spouse in another room now finds herself often ignored. This may irritate her, which may bewilder her husband.
Or perhaps what she's saying is important, so she says it again, with wholly unnecessary emphasis and volume. "You don't have to shout!" he responds, and their happy meal is headed downhill fast. Counselors say that this common problem is very disruptive. They actually show women how to look directly at their husbands, pitch their voices low, and speak slowly and clearly. Only a well-informed and loving wife can accept this new approach gracefully, especially since her husband may not even notice her extra effort.
Hopefully both partners want to avoid letting a physical problem derail a happy union. The husband may have to steel himself to getting hearing aids - never as good as natural sound - and having them adjusted until they work well. The wife will have to remember not to talk from the other room, to allow for background noise, and to keep a pleasant expression on her face even as she repeats herself.
Many couples opt for extreme measures, like surgery. Implants used to be mainly for children but now are not unusual for seniors. Active men want to hear their wives, daughters, and grandkids. They don't want to miss sermons at church, phone conversations, or the general babble at family gatherings.
Fortunately the husband in our story decides to get informed early, since he has spent his working life in a noisy environment - the military (or farming, or carpentry, or as a musician, or as a miner) - that has probably damaged his ears. He also knows that his high blood pressure, his bad circulation, and his medications can contribute to hearing loss. Being deaf is worse for relationships than being blind, so he wants to do what he can.
Specialists, clinics, and professional technicians can provide information and testing to determine the level of loss. It will really help if husbands and wives work together to anticipate this problem and seek solutions.
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